so it's been quite a long time since I've written, and hopefully any who realize this realize that this phenomena is inevitable. Especially as the semester winds down and life gets busier, and preparing to go overseas comes higher and higher on my list of priorities.

Lately things have been so dry. I've pulled away from God, stopped spending deep time in His word, all because I'm tired and I think, burned out. I've questioned if this is really what He wants me to do, am I really the right person to go to East Asia as an ambassador for Him? Because when I look at my heart, my life...it doesn't look good. But who am I to question God?

^"26Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. ²⁷But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. ²⁸He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, ²⁹so that no one may boast before him. ³⁰It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption." - 1 Corinthians 1

Does that not say it all? So by His strength, I will persevere, and by His mercy I will quit trying to be good enough, because He already knows that I'm not, and I will humble myself before Him, confessing the truth that I am a broken, sinful, obstinate person who is counted righteous only by His work. I don't want to just know that, I want to believe it and put my trust in that truth; it's the only way I can truly live. And I must say this to myself, "quit living for yourself and believing the lie that anything is better than Jesus Christ. Consider what He's done for you."