I'm hurting.

But I've decided that I want to be the kind of woman who invites people to live more fully and to be more themselves. You know, nurturing. (am I a woman yet? who knows...)

I don't want to hide.
I don't want to control.
I don't want to feel sorry for myself.
I don't want to manipulate.

I want to be honest. I want to be who I am and not be ashamed. I want to let myself mess up. I want to listen more. I want to take hold of...everything. I want to quit thinking that what I want is better than what He wants for me. He withholds no good thing from those whose walk is blameless. Well, in Christ, I'm blameless, not in myself. Thank goodness. That's His promise to me, and I'm going to believe it.

"she is responding/beat up and hurting/deserving death/but offerings of life are found instead"

I hurt. Suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us. If I choose to believe this, then this hurt is good. It doesn't feel good, but neither does setting a broken bone.