ok, so sometimes I hate change

do you ever have these friendships that rock so much for lots of time, and then something changes, whether between the two of you or at the encouragement of some outsider, or even due to some unknown random catalyst?

Yeah I don't like that. I know there are seasons for friendships, and that friendships basically always have to change, because otherwise it will get stale, but sometimes I don't think the change is for the better. Sometimes the change makes things unhappy and confusing, where you feel just like your dog died or something.

So I think I'm mourning that change right now. Usually when I do this, I run away, but in this instance, it's not all that possible. I mean, if I really tried, I could, but that would mean sacrificing a lot of other important things that I'm not willing to sacrifice. So the solution? Grin and bear it. And trust that my Jesus, who withholds no good thing from me, has the best in mind and is going to take care of it. If not on the outside, at least within my own heart.

And that brings to mind another thing: I miss Him. Do you ever get that? David did - "In your presence there is fullness of joy." I'm in his presence, I know, but I want it all. I don't want the mirror. But waiting makes things sweeter. I know it does. And it changes my heart, which is probably what I really need right now. I need more of Him and less of me.