All to You

Today I was obsessed with learning this song:

I can’t wait to get out of here
I can’t fake through this pain I feel
It’s been too long, that I’ve been gone
Now I’m coming back, I’m coming back
So long, it’s gone
This burden that I carry

I’ll give it all to You, to You

I wade out and the waves are bigger
I can’t sort through all this junk so I surrender
I’ve gone on, way too long
Now I’ve had enough, I’ll give it up to you
This storm is great, but You are so much greater

CHORUS

I can’t wait to see you standing there so bright and special
And all the waves that crashed around my head
Fall silent at the whisper of your voice

It's April and I think I'm finally seeing. At least glimpses. God has been faithful, and will continue to be. Which is crazy, because I'm just seeing the grossness of my sin. And I'm hearing about the beauty of Jesus and ever so slowly beginning to believe again that He really has covered my sin, that He desires and delights to do it, and that He had covered EVERYTHING, not just my past and my present sin, but also my future sin. I just don't get how much I need Him, I don't understand the lengths of His salvation. But I know I need a Savior, I need my Savior, my Jesus. And that He wants to do a good work in me. And that He "who calls [me] is faithful; He will DO IT" (1 thess 5:24).

All we like sheep have gone astray, we have - everyone - turned to his own way, and the Lord has laid on Him the iniquity of us all. (Is 53:6)

All I can say is I want to BE and not DO, I want to LOVE, and I want to MATTER for spreading His glory - I want to be part of it. I don't want to be the same tomorrow as I am even today. I want to be compelled by the love of my Jesus for me. Oh the implications of such desires...

Underneath all this I want to know and feel and experience His love so that everything else pleasurable loses its pleasure if it's not from Him. Because everything is a waste if it's not about the Saving, Redeeming, Breathtaking, Eternal Jesus. Without Him, life is meaningless. Where else can I go?